Dearest Maya:
I am sad to report that Trini Maldonado is longer with us. Apparently he was murdered a couple of night ago in a hotel in Cincinatti.
Why do we have such trouble in Ohio? I would really like to know.
Strangely, it appears that none of the goods he was carrying were taken, nor were his notes disturbed. While Mr. Cumberland is already on site and conducting his own investigation, it also falls to me to handle the rest of the details of his shipment and inform his family. As a result, I am sending you this and having you cover the sales event in Stockholm. If you have any further questions, you can, of course, always call or text.
Love Always.
-Desmond.
Blank Soul
Article Description: squat brown ceramic jar with a purple rosary tied securely around it’s corked opening. The veves inscribed around the base are correct to my eye.
Provenance: Msr. Lafitte DeRossier. (Remind me to send him that cream for gout we acquired in Peru. His was bothering him something fierce last time I visited.)
Analysis of Research Team: As near as the sensitives were able to determine, this is a truly blank soul, without even the rudiments of a personality that a newborn possesses. Either Lafitte was able to completely steam-clean a soul, or he’s discovered a way to create a soul from scratch. Of course, he refused to tell me how he did it, smiling like a cat that had just eaten the proverbial canary...Which leads me to think he hadn’t actually done it himself. I wouldn’t put it past the old faker.
Disposition: I am truly not sure how to handle this one. I suppose that it could be sold to anyone looking to find a way out from under a demonic contract, I suppose that it could also be used for “Patching” purposes, or could be used to give sentience to a magickal construct. I just don’t know enough about this branch of the magick to know for certain. But I trust your judgement Maya. You have a nose for these things, and I know you’ll get me the best price. The main question I suppose is whether or not Lafitte can get us a regular supply.
King Solomon’s Shovel
Article Description: A stout wooden shovel. The head has been replaced at least twice according to our understanding. It does not appear to have affected the magic of the item.
Provenance: Fence “G”
Analysis of Research Team: I’d heard about this one and even tried it out myself. According to legend, this shovel belonged to a man named King Solomon, who was a town drunk and watchman for the cemetery in the city of Lexington, Kentucky during the cholera epidemic of 1833. Apparently, the man survived to bury a significant percentage of the city, by dint of the fact that he never drank water. It is also apparent that something passed into him in those days because his shovel has become imbued with the ability to not only allow it’s user to see the shades of the recently dead...But one can actually damage them by swinging the shovel at them. One suspects that Mr. Solomon had many nocturnal battles with the recently deceased.
There is a strange downside to this remarkably useful artifact. The user is not affected by short duration contact with the item. but after a few minutes, the wielder begins to exhibit signs of being drunk... And it’s a bit like a shot of whiskey every few minutes or so. Nice and relaxed, then tiddly, then raucously happy or whatever...Then maudlin and telling everyone you love them...Then sleepy. I don’t think you can actually “Drink yourself to death” like this, as there is no actual alcohol involved. But no one on the research team is keen to test the theory. Dropping the shovel does NOT create instant sobriety. Gloves prevent the magick from working, but also prevents the ability to see the ghosts or affect them.
Disposition: This one is a known quantity in necromantic circles. Fence “G” assures me that it’s former owner won’t come looking for it. I’m not sure if I believe him. But this one ought to fetch a decent price.
Twonky Coins
Article Description: Random collections of roman, greek, egyptian and various semitic forms of coinage found in pre-columbian caches all over southern North America. Most have been cleaned or polished, some to the detriment of their collectibility.
Provenance: Various
Analysis of Research Team: Most have no discernible enchantment at all and perhaps only faint traces of residual magick. Their antiquity makes them lovely focuses for talismanic magick of many sorts.
Disposition: Every few years or so, we clean out our collections of these things. They keep turning up in odd corners. No one seems to know why. Theories abound, each less credible than the last.
Flatulin
Article Description: A re-purposed bottle of Visine which holds a liquid with a light blue tint, that disappears effortlessly into the taste of any beverage or food. We have a regular supply.
Provenance: Willhelm “Jester” Gunther. (Who is going to get himself killed one of these days.)
Analysis of Research Team: If a person is surreptitiously dosed with this material, it creates a MASSIVE gaseous reaction in the targets digestive tract. In addition to gastrointestinal distress and unstoppable belching, it creates some of the most unrelentingly toxic, lingering, normally-reserved-to-corpses, viscera-curdling farts it has ever been my displeasure to experience.
Naturally, Jester thinks this is all very funny. But he DID at least convince me that there is a market for people who might want to socially assassinate someone without bloodshed and keep their own hands relatively clean.
Disposition: Sell to customers with the following caveats: 1) DO NOT use more than a couple of drops. More than a couple of drops haven’t been tested. It may be fatal. 2) DO NOT use on a target with a colostomy bag. Even Jester admits that one went too far. (Although he himself STILL could not stop laughing.)
Agony
Article Description: A reddish gum resin, possibly Myrrh as it’s base. The first batch I’ve received was packaged in baby food jars.
Provenance: Tegyrius.
Analysis of Research Team: Once rubbed onto a object, this material makes using psychometry or retrocognition on the object impossible. Rather than effectively “Washing” the object, it gives the sensitive attempting to glean information from the object a few minutes of utter mental/physical/spiritual agony. This is enough to hospitalize some. As it did Lara Adler, on our research staff. but creates no other ill effects, Although a sensitive of advanced age could conceivably die from it.
Disposition: I suspect that unless the overhead required to mass produce this material is ruinous, Tegyrius will become a very rich man from this. It is a paranoid magi’s dream.
12 Bone Champaign Flutes
Article Description: Just what it says on the tin. I’ve noticed that the flutes show exactly no tool marks. Additionally, the flutes appear to have sculpted from the femurs of at least 6 children under the age of eight. A bit gruesome, and of questionable taste, if you ask me. Although, even I have to admit, the workmanship is exquisite.
Provenance: One of our undead friends in Charleston. I’m sure he’d just as soon we not use his name in official documents.
Analysis of Research Team: Trace amounts of magick, from their sculpting i’m sure, but the Research team seems to think that these were made for a specific magickal purpose that had not yet been imprinted on them. Lawrence says that these flutes seem primed to accept some enchantment. We’ve been looking at various rituals to see if we can determine what the ritual in question is supposed to be. But so far, we’ve come up dry.
Disposition:If purchased by an undead client or necromantic practitioner, offer a price break if they are willing to tell us what they are for. We’re all very curious.
The DEFINITIVE Mix
Article Description: a blank white cassette tape with a single piece of masking tape across it’s top that says, “DEFINITIVE” in magic marker.
Provenance:Robin Skouteris (Says he found it in a crate of music he bought second hand in Athens.)
Analysis of Research Team: Put it in your tape player and it apparently will create the perfect sound mix for whatever activity you happen to be doing. Great for parties and road trips. (Although I have noticed that every time i’ve had it on in the car, it plays the Proclaimers “500 miles” at least once.) Sadly, we have not been able to figure out if the thing can be duplicated at all.
Disposition: I almost don’t want to sell this one. Oh, if only I could have a copy for my own. Any person purchasing, ask them to see about how to do so. Perhaps we just don’t possess the audio technology acumen to go along with our magickal skills.
Smart Gum
Article Description: Bright yellow pack with friendly red letters. Strawberry flavored. Each pack possesses 5 pieces. We now have a whole warehouse full.
Provenance: Bought from Roedecker (Yes, for the millionth time, THAT Roedecker.)
Analysis of Research Team: Scientist have found that the act of chewing activates seven separate portions of a persons brain. This seems to cause a slight bump in cognitive efficiency and they’ve noticed in double blind testing that people chewing gum do measurably better on standardized tests. 3 years ago, a company attempted to capitalize on this phenomenon by creating and marketing a gum that could enhance this effect.
As it happens, they succeeded beyond their wildest dreams, and the FDA was forced to step in and shut them down. Once that happened, funding fell apart and the company went directly into receivership. Roedecker picked up their merchandise for a song.
The Gum works. creating a 20-30 point bump in IQ, for as long as you can chew it. Although it should be pointed out that the chewer become mentally exhausted at a much higher rate and normally once you stop chewing, you want a nap. Extended chewing might lead to uncontrollable narcolepsy...which of course means gum in your hair.
The thing that caused some concern for the FDA was that the Gum might possess long term effects, may shorten life-span and/or create favorable conditions for neural stripping and inoperable brain cancers. Not only that, while Smart Gum is not physically addictive, it is certainly mentally addictive. Anyone who feels the rush of their mental processes kicking into a MUCH higher gear are going to want to experience that again and again. In fact, now that I think on it, Roedecker wasn’t exactly in the peak of health when I saw him last.
Disposition: Sell it, but with the usual caveats.
Skunk Foot
Article Description: Appears to be the stuffed left paw of a skunk. it has been fitted so that it can be attached to key chain, just like the far more common rabbit’s feet.
Provenance: Morris Cullinane (Lost it to me in a card game.)
Analysis of Research Team: As long as you have this article on your person, you will completely unable to use your sense of smell. While in certain situations this can actually be dangerous, in certain other situations it is a positive boon. Your mileage may vary. In fact, the research team begged me to keep this one in house for our personal use. I’ll have to see if it can be duplicated.
Disposition: I have no idea if there is an actual demographic for this sort of article, but I suppose that there will be people who once they learn such a thing exists, will want to purchase it. Use your discretion.
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